Michael Moore has a great new idea and it involves your kids

by editor on February 21, 2011

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Being on Michael Moore’s email list is fun. A lot of fun, in fact. We get emails in which he rants and raves and comes up with all kinds of stupid leftist ideas. It’s a giant laughfest of leftist stupidity.

And now he’s come up with his dumbest idea yet. Let’s just let the fat filmmaker explain it in his own words:

From: Michael Moore
Date: Fri, Feb 18, 2011 at 1:56 PM
Subject: Join My High School Newspaper …a note to students from Michael Moore
To: The Administrator

michael-moore

Adults now ignore fat filmmaker Michael Moore, so he's going after children

Dear High School Students:

…We like to say that we have this great “free press,” and yet how free are high school newspapers? How free are you to write or blog about what you want? I’ve been sent stories from teenagers that they couldn’t get published at school. Why not? Why must we silence or keep out of sight the voice of our teenagers?

It’s not that way in other countries. The voting age in places like Austria, Brazil or Nicaragua is 16. In France, students can shut down the country by simply walking out of school and taking to the streets.But here in the U.S. you’re told to obey and to basically butt out and let the adults run the show.

Let’s change that! I’m starting something on my site called, “HIGH SCHOOL NEWSPAPER.” Here you will be able to write what you want and I will publish it. I will also post those articles that you’ve tried to get published at your school but were turned down. On my site you will have freedom and an open forum and a chance to have your voice heard by millions.

I’ve asked my 17-year-old niece, Molly, to kick things off by editing this page for the first six months. She will ask you to send her your stories and ideas and the best ones will be posted on MichaelMoore.com . I’ll give you the platform you deserve. It will be my honor to have you on my site and I encourage you to take advantage of it.

You are often called “our future.” That future is today, right here, right now. You’ve already proven you can change the world. Keep doing it. And I’d be honored to help you.

Yours,
Michael Moore
MMFlint@aol.com
MichaelMoore.com

Questions:

  1. What are the odds that Moore will print any conservative articles?
  2. How embarrassing is it to be outed as Michael Moore’s niece?
  3. Would you want Michael Moore hanging out with your children?
  4. If Michael Moore is going to begin hanging out around high schools, will Michelle Obama make him begin eating at one of her salad bars?
  5. If the writers for Michael Moore’s high school newspaper wanted to unionize and demand salaries and healthcare benefits, would Moore embrace their efforts or fire them?
  6. Is this a violation of child labor laws?

{ 48 comments… read them below or add one }

fishy February 26, 2011 at 7:29 pm

Considering how hard it is to get conservative pieces published… If publishing the censored articles is his goal, then wouldn’t that part of his website become a conservative newspaper? :/ Just sayin’.

Necron_99 February 23, 2011 at 10:24 pm

“Kind of like how conservative books have to sell more books to make it on the New York Slimes’ best sellers list than liberal rants? I’ve always wondered about these mysteries.”

That’s no mystery Perl… libtard fiction always sells better than Conservative truth according to the NY Slimes!

What?? February 23, 2011 at 7:50 pm

Am I the first to call bull**** on “the chance to have your voice heard by millions”. That chance is the fat type.This dope gets tons of free publicity everytime he craps out a boring shlockumentary, but no one is willing to see the damn things. Are we supposed to believe he has millions of devoted web fans?I’ll bet more people have seen his offer on IHTM than on his own site.

editor February 23, 2011 at 8:13 pm

We never thought of that until you mentioned it, so we went to Alexa.com to see how the two sites are ranked. Here’s a comparison:

MichaelMoore.com
Traffic Rank in world: 32,982 Traffic Rank in US: 20,856
IHateTheMedia.com
Traffic Rank in world: 76,341 Traffic Rank in US: 19,196

So you’re right and wrong. IHateTheMedia.com is bigger than MichaelMoore.com in the United States, but his popularity in socialist and communist countries makes him bigger than us internationally. Well, we assume it’s the socialists and communists who make him so popular overseas.

By the way, we can’t really say we understand Alexa.com rankings. Six months ago we were #12,000 in the USA and moving up fast. Since then our traffic has nearly doubled, yet our ranking is worse. It’s just another one of those internet mysteries.

perlcat February 23, 2011 at 8:48 pm

Kind of like how conservative books have to sell more books to make it on the New York Slimes’ best sellers list than liberal rants?

I’ve always wondered about these mysteries.

(Actually, having worked at a business that depended upon their rankings in the trade rags, I don’t wonder at all. As Krusty the Klown said in the Simpsons, “Let’s just say it moved me. Into a NEW HOUSE!!”)

TOM COTTER February 22, 2011 at 12:00 pm

HERE IS ONE GUY I WOULD LIKE TO SEE DROP DEAD FROM A MASSIVE HEART ATTACK!

Deb February 21, 2011 at 10:02 pm

Baby-the other OTHER white meat!

kb February 21, 2011 at 10:52 pm
peter February 21, 2011 at 8:22 pm

how come this,,fat,,disgusting pedofile is not in jail?
just because he is balarney franks and nancy piglosi’s illigitimate abortion,, doe’s not

give him freedom of stupidity too even address our propoganda,taught kid’s?
unless,,of course,,,they are home schooled!

whatabeanr February 21, 2011 at 5:11 pm

Has anybody ever seen Al Gore or Michael Moore in the same room? I think the glasses may be fooling us like Clark Kent…. Or it may be that they won’t fit in a room together.

KimmyQueen February 21, 2011 at 6:06 pm

I love any and all Al Gore is fat jokes… thanks

GruffGadfly February 21, 2011 at 7:44 pm

Mainly between the ears. Turns out ignorant self righteousness has the same effect on the brain that alcohol has on the liver. When Gore dies, if he donates his brain to science, I think it’ll only be a matter of days before there’s an announcement that being too smug causes steatosis of the brain.

perlcat February 21, 2011 at 11:07 pm

…but where will they *find* his brain? $60,000 question.

Necron_99 February 23, 2011 at 7:54 pm

Right between his prostate and his colon.

hisham February 21, 2011 at 9:02 pm

I really don’t know sir, you pose a very thought provoking question…hmmmm.

KimmyQueen February 21, 2011 at 2:54 pm

When they cannot turn the adults they come for the kids Al Gore did that too and he failed.

deepthinker February 22, 2011 at 7:38 am

K Q

Tread carefully. All parties that have attempted to over throw or take over have resorted to those under thirty.

When someone starts spouting off about the children I become suspicious and question their motives. With morbid moore and his kind, it is obvious.

On a good note. Did you catch a glimpse of your possible husband on here? 🙂

KimmyQueen February 22, 2011 at 5:32 pm

Yes every single despotic regime goes for the kids and young adults. That is why it is so important for parents to do their jobs.

Yes I saw him, but the Editor killed the fantasy by letting me know he is married :-D.

editor February 22, 2011 at 5:40 pm

Don’t hold a grudge, Kimmy. Keep your ears open, because his wife could always get hit by a truck. Just make sure you’re not behind the wheel.

KimmyQueen February 22, 2011 at 6:17 pm

Oh my! LOLOLOL

We’re cool Editor I am thankful for the pic and story, it gives me hope.

deepthinker February 21, 2011 at 2:13 pm

Looks like Moore didn’t get the memo for the bitch in the white house. He has gotten even larger. Maybe she can give him her plan for the children, seeing that he thinks and acts like a spoiled child.

Michael put down the pizza and get up of you very large ass and do some thing worth while.

Necron_99 February 21, 2011 at 6:19 pm

Moore needs to go through Basic Camp… He reminds me of John Candy’s character Ox in ‘Stripes’… “My therapist told me I swallowed a lot of aggression… along with a lot of pizzas.”

J.P. Travis February 21, 2011 at 11:54 am

Whew. I saw the headline, “Michael Moore has a great new idea and it involves your kids,” and my first thought was, “Oh Lord, he’s going to start eating children!”

So it’s not as bad as I thought.

hisham February 21, 2011 at 2:21 pm

“Oh Lord, he’s going to start eating children!”

HA, HA, HA, HE, HO, HA, ROFLMAO. It’s a good thing I live in a town that roles up its streets after 8PM, this land whale probably doesn’t come out of his cave until after nine and the children he might eat at that time of the evening are more than likely up to no good, in other words, libtard children and full of bad cholesterol.

jukin February 21, 2011 at 5:00 pm

He likes his baby back, baby backs. He likes his baby back, baby backs.

Jabba Moore has blown through XXL, XXXL, XXXXL, and is now into “OH MY GOOD ITS COMING AT ME!!!” T-shirts.

KimmyQueen February 21, 2011 at 6:06 pm

After three minutes of laughter I just had to take the time to thank you.

Necron_99 February 21, 2011 at 6:16 pm

“Oh Lord, he’s going to start eating children!”

Michael Moore’s version of ‘A Modest Proposal’?

StrinaM February 21, 2011 at 11:15 am

The Editor and Administrator are some brave and committed individuals. I couldn’t be on his mailing list without taking some serious doses of Lithium, Prozac and Ambien to counteract the idiotic insanity that is Michael Moore.

whatabeanr February 21, 2011 at 9:41 am

Good story as always, but why do you have a picture of Jabba the Hut?

Grammar Fuhrer February 21, 2011 at 9:51 am

Are you kidding? Even Jabba would say “DAMN!” if he saw this.

perlcat February 21, 2011 at 8:03 am

If that fat f*ck is so damned smart, how come *he* couldn’t manage to graduate from high school?

If I had attained that high level of failure, seems to me to be a good idea to keep my name and an association with the term ‘high school’ out of the news.

theBeachBumConservative February 21, 2011 at 8:20 am

haha. would be a great story, unfortunately, he graduated from Davison High in Davison, Michigan.

He dropped out of College.

perlcat February 21, 2011 at 8:26 am

Sorry, my bad, then. I should have checked his entry in dickipedia:

http://www.dickipedia.org/dick.php?title=Michael_Moore

perlcat February 21, 2011 at 8:33 am

…and before anybody gets worked up about all the conservatives on the list, remember that as a wiki, we can probably add enough liberal dicks to “compensate”. It seems like a good activity.

Happy dick listing.

Grammar Fuhrer February 21, 2011 at 9:12 am
RockingHorseGuy February 21, 2011 at 10:13 am

Cool article, but don’t try to scout around on that site to see what else they have. It’s pop-up hell. The kind that make it difficult to leave their page. I always assume those kind of people are up to no good.

perlcat February 21, 2011 at 10:57 am

…and then I looked at the bottom of the page, and I saw huffpo.

Figures.

Grammar Fuhrer February 21, 2011 at 7:29 pm

Oh, really?

Strange, I’ve never gotten a pop-up, though I have blocked a few ads here and there.

Possibly has something to do with adblock or noscript. Most likely both.

TOM COTTER February 22, 2011 at 12:02 pm
theBeachBumConservative February 21, 2011 at 7:21 am

I would bet ya, that these articles penned by Americas ‘bright future’, involves one or more of the following topics;

1. A piece of lefty Propaganda, so crass and untruthful, that it makes Shudder even the Teachers Union Thug raking in $60.000 extra for Running the School Newspaper.

2. Discusses Sexual acts not heard of since the times of Caligula, involving the Gym Teacher.

3. Is a well written article that endorses a Traditional American value/ and or, endorses a Conservative position.

Now, what Michael is going to do with 1 is; Put it on his website.
with, 2; Those are going into his ‘Personal’ Folder at home.
and 3; He is going to disseminate the names of these ‘Morons’ to every Collegiate Board in the country, to make sure they attend Community College.

toocoldinwa February 21, 2011 at 7:08 am

Of course it’s someone else’s kids and not his own. What woman would want to mate with THAT?

Deb February 21, 2011 at 9:59 pm

Ewwwwwww! Thanks alot for THAT visual. Bleach for my brain, quick! Double Ewwwwww!

RIM February 21, 2011 at 6:59 am

Oh, that’s just swell! I can just imagine some of the crap that will be posted on this HIGH SCHOOL NEWSPAPER. It’s the very rare teenager that can come off as not being purely emotional and nonsensical, and I ain’t holding my breath that Molly is one. Cheeezeee! What a buffoon!

Ryan February 21, 2011 at 9:24 am

Please don’t say Cheeeezee. You don’t want Mr. Moore thinking you have food. It would be. . .very. . .unpleasant.

the1derwoman February 21, 2011 at 6:31 am

But Molly can decide if your voice can be heard. No censorship here kids. Ignore that Molly behind the curtain!

Bruce February 21, 2011 at 5:30 am

Will this fat f*&k be in a van parked by the virtual play ground? “OOOoo, I lost my puppy, will you help me look?”

theBeachBumConservative February 21, 2011 at 7:40 am

please, don’t give anybody any ideas. its a sick world.

Big Al February 21, 2011 at 4:53 am

Thanks for the email address Michael “I Eat” Moore. I believe that it would only be proper for us to send him a message. Think it out,take your time and have fun.

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